Merry XXX-Mas, Motherfuckers!!!



Christmas is over. I am so sad, because I fucking love Christmas.

Now I don’t know what to talk about or what to look forward to….

Now I don’t know what shitty gift to save up for so I can disappoint my ex-wife who I hate…

I don’t know who I’ll fake being excited to hear from…

I don’t know how I’ll interact with less bitter store clerks…

I don’t know where I’ll find lonely, single, middle-aged women to seduce with the “so you’re alone for the holidays” angle…

Another year older and another Christmas over…now just memories we will soon forget…but I fucking love Christmas. So Merry Christmas to all…and to all a good night…filled with back alley blowjobs! Tis always the season…


P.S. The video below was just emailed to me, starring some former Miss Ukraine who has become a fake titty, fake hair, trash can of a stripper…you know, the kind you’d find in Playboy or some shitty YouTube video…low-grade pussy starving for attention…also known as my dream girl. I figure if it’s hot enough for me to masturbate to…you can handle it, too...

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