“iCarly” Star Emily Ratajkowski’s Naked Perfection



I am the most inconsistent person on the Internet. True fucking story. For example, when this Emily Ratajkowski bitch first dropped, I was excited. I thought, “Shit…this girl’s a fucking babe and she gets naked in fashion shoots while trying to launch an acting career. That’s amazing!” So I started posting her pics like it fucking mattered. But now all I see is phony Hollywood bullshit. Maybe I’m just not horny because my obese wife is breathing hard next to me and giving me “the eye.”

Seriously. Her implants, her fake lips, her starvation diet, her fake hotness that makes a bitch look like she’s morphing into a tranny—it all leaves me cold and flaccid. I still like looking at her...and I dig that she does erotica on her quest for fame and fortune…and I dig that her nakedness is all that is working for her in that quest. But I think I jumped the gun. She’s not as hot as I originally thought. Then again, this may all stem from the fact she’s blocked me on Facebook.

I’m sensitive like that.

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