Presenting The First Terrible New Superman Movie Trailer!!!

Now, do I mean this first trailer for “Man of Steel” is terrible, or do I mean that the “Man of Steel” movie itself is terrible, and this just happens to be the first teaser for it? I’m not sure. All I know is this: If you watched “Superman Returns,” and thought to yourself “Man, you know this movie needs? Superman working on a fishing boat and hitchhiking like a goddamn bum,” then brother, you are in for a treat! 

I mean, where the fuck is Lex Luthor? Will Amy Adams be spelling “Pulitzer Prize” and “Nobel Prize” over and over while hanging off the Eiffel Tower elevator? Margot Kidder was so fucking good in “Superman II.” She was such a pointy bitch. She smoked. We need a Lois Lane who smokes. Oh, and Sarah Douglas as Ursa! That ho was hot: “SSUUPERRMAANN!” she called in a mocking, vicious manner as she flipped up the manhole cover and flung it at Supes (6:10). How that doesn’t make the opening reel of Hollywood classics at the Oscars every year I’ll never know.
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