ESCANDALO: Kate Upton Makes Love To A Hamburger!!!

Kate Upton’s a hot 19-year-old model who’s currently the Internet’s girlfriend, or fake girlfriend to all the web’s lonely guys. I want to say “you know her from Sports Illustrated” but does anyone still read that rag? Really, you know her from all the numerous web sites that publish photos of bikini babes. And if for some reason you’ve missed out staring at her tight body, if you’re still in the dark over who she is, she’ll be everywhere soon as she’s blowing up with appearances in movies and on TV and now her first ESCANDALO!!!

And by scandal I mean “complete retarded-ness from some prudish douche that most people are ignoring.” Kate stars in a new commercial for the fast food joint Carl’s Jr. where she sexily eats a hamburger and some people are outraged. Take sex addiction “expert” Steve Arteburn, he thinks the ad is dangerous because it’s corrupting our youth! It’s turning men into sex addicts!! It’s inflaming the twisted passions of all the current sex addicts!!!

See, Stevie’s not a doctor or a counselor but he is a crazed religious nut and he runs a ministry to “save” sex addicts. He’s actually contacted Carl Jr.’s and the press demanding the commercial be removed from circulation. Arteburn has to say on the matter:

“A guy’s just sitting there watching a program, and it’s a hamburger ad, and all of a sudden it’s somebody having sex with a hamburger.”

Carl’s Jr. has actually gone through the effort of releasing a statement to the press (fuck guys, don’t waste your breath on these loonies) but luckily the burger joint’s statement basically blows off the concerns of these fundamentalist crackerjacks. I’ve placed the burger porn advertisement here so it turn you into a helpless, slobbering, perverted beast:

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