Jason Sudeikis’ Secret with Women Revealed

Jason Sudeikis is goofy-looking and untalented, yet he has banged some of Hollywood’s choicest pieces of ass including Scarlett Johansson, Eva Mendes, January Jones, and current girlfriend Olivia Wilde.

How has this nothing of a man pulled off such an impressive feat? Is he secretly a Shallow Man? Certainly that would explain his success with the ladies.

After consulting with the a panel of seduction experts, it has been determined that Jason Sudeikis is no Shallow Man, but that Jason’s secret then must be that his penis is made out of chocolate and it ejaculates diamonds.
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