Hot Slut of the Day: Jack, The Sheep Who Thinks He’s A Dog



Congratulations to Jack, the genius sheep who has baaaaaaah-trayed his own kind by pretending that he’s a dog! That’ll do, lamb! That’ll do.

Alison Sinstadt, a farmer from Shropshire, England, and her partner Simon Sherwin brought Jack into their home when he was just a lamb baby because he was very, very small and they felt he needed some extra loving care. They gave him milk and they let him sleep with their springer spaniel Jessie.

It didn’t take long for Jack to copy everything Jessie was doing. When Jessie let out a dog bark, Jack tried to let out a dog bark too but it sounded more like an un-autotuned Rihanna trying to hit a high note. When Jessie fetched a stick, Jack tried to fetch a stick too. Jack doesn’t even socialize with other sheep and whenever he’s around them he tries to herd their asses (“THIS BAAAAAHTCH” - other sheep to Jack).

Alison tells the highly acclaimed literary journal The Daily Fuckery Mail that the only thing Jack does that is sheep-like is eat grass. But other than that, the sheep thinks it’s of the dogs.

The wool has officially been pulled over Alison’s eyes and she’s not even trying to scratch it off. The easiest way to avoid getting turned into stew is to bark, fetch and do it like a dog! I mean, what kind of evil soul would ever slaughter a sheep dog?! Jack might be leading the oppression of his kind, but bitch is a mastermind genius. Now if he can only learn how to lick his own lamb hole…



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