The Shallow Man Diaries (Part 8): I Believe

I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman’s back.

I believe in Levi’s 501 jeans, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Stephenie Meyer are self-indulgent, overrated crap.

I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing ponytails on men and talk shows by Boy Abunda.

I believe in the G-spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and yes, I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

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