The Shallow Man Diaries (Part 6): An Ode To Chichis

Baby, I’m begging you…PLEASE STOP DIETING! For the love of God and for the sake of your magnificent chichis!

How am I supposed to put my ear to your bountiful boobies and hear the angels yodel on the highest mountain peak in heaven? How am I supposed to save my keystrokes and not cyber slobber on and on about your perfectly shaped chesticles? THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

But just this once, I won’t write a long haiku about how your chichis look like the ethereal pathway to heaven. Or how when I motorboat you long enough, I see God winking back at me. I won’t do that. Instead I’ll silently Photoshop myself leaping from one chichi to another.

To recap: Stop dieting. Save the chichis. Preserve world peace. Truly, it would be a damn shame if those tantalizing titties are gone to naught :(
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